Ultimatly Bourne to Love Damon

Mmmm Matt.

It can’t get better than Bourne 3, with 2 hours of watching Matt Damon run back and forth across the screen like pac-man in heat.

OK, I liked it. Of course. Paul Greengrass is genius. That car scene is even better than Russia 2004.

That said, I do have some notes.

First off, this movie is non other than one long third act chase. The entire sequence of events really just builds on what we missed in 2. The character doesn’t develop and when Bourne finally gets to meet his maker in the stark New York City office, he does nothing about it. This moment should have come at midpoint and the second half of the movie would take us beyond the CIA and into a world where Bourne made the decisions that brought him here today. Even the key art suggests we’d get some of the answers to these questions.

An American hero who kills to save the lives of others. How poignant could you get? Very, if only you would have illuminated it ultimately for us.

No Reservations Needed, This Movie Won’t Fill a House

Catherine Zeta-Jones isn’t American but her sister and niece are. That doesn’t make sense to me, so, what could have been a lovely movie about a practically frigid woman discovering hot sauce in her own austere kitchen, turns out to be a blitz on the very genre it's trying to re-define.

First of all, it's sad. Don't they know the first rule of Romantic Comedies? Keep death to the comedic moments. If someone croaks, they better be wearing a clown suit. Rule number two, every time your main character cries, the story becomes less romantic and more like a drama. And we know the people who like dramas aren't the same ones who like rom-coms. And three, if the romantic interest isn't at odds with your hero (CZJ), what's the point of watching the movie in the first place?

That said, in a summer of food movies, Ratatouille, to name one (there must be others, no?), this sizzle pic is a fallen soufflé.

Yes there are crying scene, yes Abigail Breslin (Little Ms. Sunshine…) is wonderful, CZJ is beautiful and Aaron Eckhart is lovable, but, well, eh.

Please help me comment as I’m at a loss for words about a film whose title has nothing to do with the plot.

No Reservations Can stay booked, for all I care.

It smells like yesterdays fish.

Hairspray Sticks!

It’s a musical and John Travolta dances. What more could you want from a movie?

Not much…

Except Queen Latifah and whole lot of rhythm. There’s not much to critique, except, well… a main character issue. (The following should not take away from the stellar performances by Latifa, Christopher Walken, Michelle Pfeiffer and especially the "Negro Singers." Truly marvelous! A must-see.)

I assume the main character was Tracy Turnblad, but please correct me if I’m wrong. And if you say it’s an ensemble cast, I challenge you to narrow the story down to one central character. The writers must have. For me, I'm guessing, that was Tracy.

While she was an excellent singer and dancer, lovable naïve and strong, I didn’t feel like she had all that much to lose if she didn’t get to be on the show.

She risks life and limb to stand up for what is right (in an amazingly touching scene led by the poignant performance of Latifa), but in the end it doesn’t seem to matter to her parents, the show or her fans if she’s not on Corny Collins show anymore.

The stakes weren’t high enough for Tracy, and therefore, tension was lost in the third act, when the Ms. Hairspray contest turned into an outrageous dance-a-thon rather than a culmination of all that was amazing about the first 80 minutes of the movie.

Talk To Me Speaks Wonders

In the business, they say, “To have a good hero, you’ve got to have a good villain.” And that can’t be more true in the classical sense than in “Talk to Me.”

It’s a story of Petey Greene, played by Don Cheadle, the outrageous talk show host who “cons” his way into a job at an influential D.C. radio station during the Civil Rights Movement.

Once there, Petey proves to be nothing short of a pain in the ass, although when things get rough, the station soon finds out, a man with a voice is better than none at all.

Station executive Dewey Hughes, played by Chiwetel Ejiofor, is all for controversy if it draws listeners, but keeping this short fuse from lighting up is more than he bargained for.

That said, it would seem that Petey Greene is the main character in this film, with Dewey nothing but a speed bump in his road to stardom, but in fact, if you take a closer look, you’ll find that Dewey is the protagonist.

Petey invades Dewey’s turf. Wild and careless, Petey pushes Dewey to change. Petey is, by the end of the movie, the one who has Dewey saying, “Talk to me.”

It goes to show that story structure, when used to create the best story, doesn’t have to be by the book.

This movie uses an antagonist flip to pull off a brilliantly written story strong in character, conflict and concept.

In addition to that, it’s hard enough to keep the hero and the villain in the same scenes with each other for even 25% of the movie, let along half. So, when a feature-length drama pulls off 75%, it’s worth noting -- a feat of facing off. And it’s a movie about talking, one-on-one. Isn’t that beautiful?

Enough said.

Ratatouille Serves Main Course to Adults, Side Dish to Kids

It is, I will say this, without seeing the fall lineup or Labor Day surprises, the most well written film of the year. That said, this animation is for adults, not children.

The poignant quest for lost dreams, a beautiful turnaround by a bitter critic (we all know that person, lingering deep inside, judging everything we do), and a stumbling garbage boy who just wants to run the place, are content geared entirely for adults.

Children don’t need to lament the loss of their dreams. They haven’t had that chance yet. That’s why, when sitting in the theater with a 6 and 9-year-old who were digging in popcorn barrels and slurping on Pepsis, did I realize, it was me who wanted to be inspired by the little rat that could, not them.

They were, well… a little bored. At least until the maniacal chase at the end, where pots and pans and beautiful set pieces of rats overtaking a kitchen went into full play. This was no Shrek with fart jokes and dim-witted humor, but a melancholy tale that everyman, and woman, who wants to succeed but feels the trappings of fear of failure, needs to see.

Ratatouille is like Jean-Pierre Jeunet’s “Amelie,” in animation. You’ll leave feeling heart-struck, wanting to make all the goodness in your life a reality, but remember, when you’re sitting in the theater with restless kids, keep them in their seats, mostly, so you can see the end.

Almighty Funny, But Lacks Honey

This film is nothing but a string of jokes, folks, and all of them, to see how much pain we can inflict on Steve Carell.

I know it’s no biblical replay of the pain and suffering Noah went through to build an arc against all doubt, but once you hint that the world might be flooded, well… we kind of want to see a flood. A giant one. Not just a trickle of water down a valley adjacent to Washington D.C., where countless people are “perfectly fine,” sitting in their cars watching a wave bust down the street that doesn’t kill anymore.

I’m not saying I want death. In fact, I’m probably the only person you’ll meet who didn’t like Titanic because of all the drowning. It is my least favorite way to die. If we have to choose favorites.

That said, the story of Noah is about death. It’s about God killing everyone who hasn’t followed his will, and how the earth is, well, covered in jackasses. (We all know they won’t have to build a set for that. Just go out your front door, you’ll smack into the problem.)

Therefore, the “faith” portion of this story, the one where we learn to be good to our neighbors – have random acts of kindness - arrives when we see how Noah acts in an absence of faith. This happens when Noah, after he builds the arc and the flood comes, doesn’t hear hide nor hair from God for several day. All of a sudden, there is no land – anywhere – and the arc is starting to look like a bad idea, filled with animals and an angry wife.

Noah then must keep peace, send out the birds, look for land himself. God got him into this, but he’ll have to get himself out. The wife, the sons and their wives are antsy, supplies are running low and general malaise is kicking in. This is when our hero, Noah, must save the day with his incredible “faith.”

The birds are sent, and finally, with an olive branch, they return.

Noah turns to the wife and here we find that, believe in one’s potential is the greatest gift anyone, God or man, can give. And that is the meaning of changing the world to do what’s right.

Die Hard Action Amazing, Yet Absurd

The action movie that doesn’t know it’s an action movie is a problem. This one gloats in its genre. Which do you prefer?

Either way, here’s what happens when you become too self aware:

1. You forget why we loved you:

The charm of Die Hard is its plea to the regular guy. John McClane is a New York City cop who gets into more trouble that he should be able to handle. We love seeing him get out of it. This time, McClane is so damn invincible it’s unbelievable. I’ve never fallen off a jet before. Have you?

2. You forget we love the average guy so much we also love his even more average sidekick:

The beat cop in I, the quirky janitor in II and the “Good Samaritan” in III all made us feel like, yeah, we too could be in a Die Hard movie. These were all guys who were even less of heroes than McClane. They got mixed up and spit out, and we loved that, too. Replacing them with a hacker who the audience can’t identify with removed the connectivity and heart behind the series.

3. You forgot that heroes don’t know they’re heroes:

McClane’s heroic no dinners, divorce and my kids hate me speech is way too “on the nose” for the genre. Come on guys, the basis if this kind of hero is to not establish his heroics. Lose the speech and replace with some falling action, so we can have some down time between explosions.

4. You forgot we love the all-American angle:

It’s the Fourth of July. Bruce Willis is a republican. If you’re going to regurgitate nationalism, now’s the time. The threat against the United States and its people was introduced nicely in the first half, but after that, the audience never gets closure on the fear and heartache we’ve all just witnessed. Sure, McClane gets his daughter back, but what about my power and the idea that the Capitol building has just been destroyed? If I call 911, is John McClane going to answer? Thanks for adding to our fear Fourth of July and letting those terrorists win.

5. You forgot that action is like sex, we have to want it:

Tease the audience with the right amount of action and we’ll feel breathless. Choke us with sequence after sequence and we’ll feel like we’re at a hot dog eating contest. The pacing was off you’re your gluttony of blow-up moments that with each scene, they lost appeal. You can’t bold everything or nothing is bold.